It was late night, and I was wondering what to do with the paper scrap accumulated at my place. I took the scrap out and saw the pages and books, writing pads, binder and an old notebook. I took it out and kept it aside. A was curious to check it. I winded up everything quick. The notebook was pretty old but the cover still had a shine. I was surprised to see it. It looked very recent but smell old. I tell you the smell of pages is so exquisite for me. It’s a different series of book, said my mind. Being a stationary lover, I follow certain series of notebook for a time to stamp when I used it and then replace it with new series. But this one was tough. I tried to recall a lot, but gave up.
I wondered through my mind when I first took that book, felt like someone has mentions Her name to me. I remembered when I say goodbye, perhaps last one to her, how hard it was to say first hello to Her. Destiny plays sometimes and gives us a hope that our dream may come true. I was annoyed by these thoughts and speedily opened the book.
It was blank. I again check and found some writing at few Random pages. I opened the second page (I usually put first page empty in my notebook) it was titled #Swear ! I immediately recognised by whom it has been written. I closed it slowly. My heart skipped a beat or two. She once again flashed in my present. I recall the exact line, we shared to each other…..
” I swear to be with you for the rest of my life”. I went to the next page to find another writing. “I swear I’ll be true to my feelings for you”. I gasped and flutter more pages, “I swear I’ll share my smile and tears with you even when Life is hard, and there’s nothing left”.
A few more, ” I swear i’ll erase everything and i’ll forget about you, if you ever leave me”
There was a note beneath in small,”Too bad Masoom” in red color. In blue the reply was “this might be the hardest thing I will ever have to”
Emotions started building. “I swear I will be eye-talking to you in every phase”
This made a rise and after few more turns before the end of book, in the opposite side it was written,
“Hey Masoom, I swear my life is more than blank without you”
Tear slipped from eye, as pupils couldn’t hold on the emotions of a person who made me understand the meaning of friendship and compassion. The atmosphere changed inside out. I couldn’t find anything else but the flash of sudden events, I would never have to be with. I put the book and tried to sleep but failed. A blank notebook which has few of the strongest words; had melted my heart and existance.
Why did this happened ? Because of The person ? The feelings ? The emotions ? The bond ? or a Nature’s signal of something special.
I was speechless and thoughtless for the rest of my night; Remembering her name and lyrics,
“But I have not the words here to explain Gone is the grace for expressions of passion But there are worlds and worlds of ways to explain To tell you how I feel But I am speechless, speechless That’s how you make me feel ~ MJ “
Note: In this digital age, people might have forgotten the notebook, but I still adore them. I write and preserve them.
He is a science graduate currently working on the planetary atmospheres in Space sciences. He is a Python and Perl Programmer. He blogs about the anecdotes on feelings, life and social experiences. He can be contacted on Twitter @masoomjethwa.
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